I'm in a rather reflective mood this morning. I just got finished listening to Keith's memorial service. I thought I would take a few moments to pour out my heart.

You can't go shopping without being bombarded with Valentine's Day "junk." I don't say "junk" because I'm bitter that I don't have a Valentine this year. I say "junk" because that is what it is. Does anyone really want a stuffed animal holding an artificial rose or that huge box of mystery chocolates? I dare say no. Things cannot demonstrate your love. Even Hallmark cards can't truly caputure what you feel for another person.

Keith and I never did anything super special for Valentine's Day. Sometimes he made me dinner or took me out to eat. We might have exchanged small gifts, but the actual day was never that big of a deal for us. I think part of that was due to the fact that Keith didn't wait for the one day a year when it is acceptable to say "I love you." He said it every single day. Sometimes he even said it multiple times. In his last days, he spoke those words more freely than ever. (I think he even told my mom that he loved her.) If you have a hard time speaking those three words, I hope that you will work on that. It brings me more comfort than I can express to know that Keith loved me without a doubt.

I also think it is interesting how my perspective has changed. While Keith was alive and well, it was so easy for me to see his negative traits. Now that he is gone, I see so many wonderful things about my husband. I wish that I could go back in time and talk with him about all the good things that I see. Of course we had those discussions from time to time, but like everyone else, it was the less desirable traits that got most of the attention. I have also found that in seeing his good traits, I start to see my own shortcomings more clearly. There are several things that I wish I could go back and change.

My hope in sharing this with you is that you will learn from my experience. Instead of spending an hour in the card section this Valentine's Day, take that hour and write your loved ones letters explaining why you love them so much. I have a few letters like that from Keith, and they mean the world to me.