This is our last week in the house. Though I know I am making the right decision to move closer to my parents, it's going to be so hard to leave. My mind knows that it's just a house. My mind knows that my memories will follow me wherever I go. My heart just isn't there.

I think the hardest thing about all of this is that moving is the first step in moving on. I have spent the past seven months surviving. I know that I can't go on living like this forever. I know that I need to get out of the house more. I know that I need to do more with friends. I know that I need to be plugged in at church. Knowing this and actually doing these things are two different stories.

It's scary to think about putting myself out there again. When I'm at home, I'm safe. I don't have to worry about people saying the wrong things. I don't have to see dads interacting with their kids or spouses interacting with each other. The time has come that I need to leave my safety net. I don't want to live the rest of my life like this. I know that Keith would not want me to be sad forever. So, I'm taking the first step toward "living" again. Thankfully, I don't have to do this alone. God has been with me every step of the way. I know that He will provide me with the strength and courage that I need.