The last few weeks have been really busy. It's been easy to push my grief aside. Afterall, who wants to stop and think about unpleasant things? Instead, I have busied my mind with countless to do lists and projects, but with mom and dad gone, the house is quieter. There isn't anyone to keep me company once Lincoln goes to bed, so I've spent some time thinking about where I am.

It's hard to believe that it's been 9 months since Keith passed away. In some ways it feels like it was 9 years ago instead of 9 months ago. As time goes by, I feel him fading from my memory. It's a struggle to remember the sound of his voice or the feel of my hand in his. It's almost as if our life together was a dream.

For the most part, I put up a brave front. I'm trying so hard to be okay with all that has happened, but the truth is that I'm not okay with it. I miss Keith, and I'm tired of hurting. I just wish I knew when the hurting would stop. I wish I knew when this feeling of emptiness would fade away. I wish I knew when this sense of sadness would be replaced with a sense of joy.