I've hesitated in writing this entry for fear some may think I'm crazy. I told you that I would take you on this journey, so here it goes. . .weird stuff happens at our house sometimes.

A few days after Keith's death, I was trying to put the computer to "sleep." Since the computer had been acting up, I didn't want to turn it off for fear that I couldn't get it back on. One night, I clicked the sleep button. Instead of going to sleep, the computer turned back on. I didn't think anything about it the first time it happened. I just figured that I pushed the wrong button. I pushed the sleep button again, and the computer did the same thing again. I think it did that about 3 times. At that moment, I felt Keith's presence. I felt like he was checking in and telling me that he was okay. ( I continued to put the computer to sleep for months after that, and that never happend again.)

Lincoln has a toy that has four buttons, and when you push a button, it plays one of four songs. One day when one of the hospice nurses was at our house, Lincoln was playing with that toy. One of the songs started playing, and Keith said "That was the first song I ever sang to Lincoln." I just laughed when he said that. I think it might be the intro song to the Lone Ranger. I'm not sure about that. I hum this tune when I'm playing horse with Lincoln. Anyways, this toy has started playing that specific song by itself a handful of times. I can think of two times when I was sitting in our bonus room sobbing and the toy started playing. The toy was on the other side of the room. Lincoln and I weren't anywhere near it. One day last month Lincoln and I were headed out for a walk. He had just really started walking well, and it went off. It was like Keith wanted me to know that he could see Lincoln walking.

The tape of Keith's sermon is in the stereo in the living room. It has started playing on its own four nights in a row. The first time it happened, it scared me. I woke up from a dead sleep because a man was talking in my living room. After a few moments, I realized that it was the tape. I went into the living room, turned it off, and went back to sleep. The next night I made sure that the stereo was turned off before I went to bed. I woke up again at about 12:30am to Keith's voice. This happened two more nights.

This last experience freaked me out. It's not that it scared me. I just didn't know what to think. If someone told me these stories a year ago, I would have thought they were crazy. I went to the young widow website, and I noticed that there was an entry on this exact subject.

I'm a left brained person. I keep trying to figure out how these things are happening. Maybe there's a short in the toy. If that were the case, why does it only start playing when I'm upset and why is it only playing that one song? The stereo has completely baffled me. I know I turned the stereo off. I even double checked the third night, yet it started playing. I've had the stereo for six years, and it has never done this before.

I've decided to stop trying to figure it all out. If it were me that was in heaven, I would hope that God would let me check in on my loved ones every once in a while.